To Schedule or Not to Schedule… My Life Long Dilemma.

Apr 24

My whole life, I’ve felt like an octagonal peg trying to fit into a square hole. I don’t really fit in anywhere, yet somehow, I feel comfortable almost everywhere—my husband calls me “all-wheel drive”.

Unfortunately, for so long, I carried the misguided belief that I had to fit the molds I saw around me. And trust me — I tried. But nothing ever felt quite right. Instead of recognizing the beauty in my uniqueness, I blamed myself for not fitting in. It's taken time, self-work, and a lot of (not to be cheesy) self-love to start truly appreciating who I am — quirks and all.

For years, I was immersed in the world of wellness, seeking ways to feel better, look better, and optimize my health. With that came protocols. And of course... routines. Morning routines to boost energy, work routines to increase productivity, exercise routines to be strong (and look my best), nighttime routines for radiant skin and great sleep. I would enthusiastically dive in, planning everything down to the minute.

And then? Within weeks — sometimes even days — I’d feel flat, bored, and completely uninspired.

I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong. Everyone around me seemed to be thriving on structure, while I kept falling off the wagon. I tried everything: productivity courses, calendar systems, planning my day the night before. But none of it stuck.

It wasn’t until I dove deep into Human Design that I discovered why.

I’m a Quad Right — and That Changes Everything

In Human Design, there are four arrows at the top of your chart. They point either left (strategic) or right (receptive). Most people have a mix — some arrows left, some right. But a small percentage of the population (about 0.1%) has all four arrows pointing to the right. We’re called Quad Right. There is also a small percentage of the population that is Quad Left, with all arrows pointing left. (Find out here where your arrows point).

And this explained so much.

Quad Rights are fluid, receptive, feminine in energy, and deeply perceptive. We’re not built to live in a hyper-structured, goal-driven, hustle-mode kind of way. Instead, we thrive when we have the space to flow — when we follow inspiration rather than ticking boxes.

We're here to receive life, not control it.

This was a huge aha moment for me. All those routines I was trying to force? They were out of alignment with how I’m designed to operate.

Living in a world that values the strategic, the planned, the linear — it’s no wonder I felt off. My genius lives in the nonlinear, the experiential, and the intuitive. I'm sensitive to environment, timing, energy — and I now know that my success comes from presence, not productivity.

The irony? Both my husband and my child are mostly left in their designs — they love structure, sameness, and predictability. So, navigating that contrast has been interesting, to say the least.

Deconditioning Is Hard — But Worth It

In Human Design, “deconditioning” refers to the process of unlearning what society, family, and culture told you you should be. It’s not always easy. There are still days I wish I were more structured, focused, or goal-oriented.

But those straight up, are not my gifts. I am now beginning to see the strength in receptivity — even if I haven’t seen many examples of it modeled s in the world.

The 4 Arrows: Strategy vs. Receptivity

Here’s a breakdown of the four arrows at the top of the Human Design chart and what they mean:

1. Top Left Arrow — Digestion / Brain Function (Determination)

How you mentally and physically digest life.

Left (Strategic): Active brain, focused learning, loves structure and repetition.
Right (Receptive): Learns passively, through environment and flow.
Quad Right takeaway: Best to absorb info naturally — no rigid study plans.

2. Bottom Left Arrow — Environment

How your body aligns with the world around you.

Left: Needs active engagement with space and structure.
Right: Sensitive to energies, nourished by being in the right place.
Quad Right takeaway: Environment matters more than doing — curate spaces that feel good.

3. Top Right Arrow — Perspective (Vision)

Your visual orientation and how you perceive the world.

Left: Narrow, focused vision; detail-oriented and goal-driven.
Right: Sees the big picture, absorbs themes and patterns.
Quad Right takeaway: Trust the full picture — don’t force focus or zoom in.

4. Bottom Right Arrow — Motivation / Manifestation (View)

How you take action and stay aligned with your drive.

Left: Strategic action, planning, timelines.
Right: Waits for the right energy and timing; not designed to initiate.
Quad Right takeaway: Move when it feels right, not when the clock says so.

How Quad Rights Thrive

We’re not here to hustle. We’re here to dance with life. Here’s what works best for Quad Rights:

Loose schedules – Think rhythms, not rigid time blocks
Follow your energy – Do things when inspiration strikes
Time-block for openness – Leave space for flow, not just tasks
Ditch the to-do lists – Trust you'll get what matters done
Curate your environment – Energy of space and people is everything
Wait to respond – Let life show you what’s next

What Doesn’t Work

9–5 routines
Productivity hacks and micro-schedules
Goal-setting without heart or energy
Chaotic, noisy, or high-pressure environments

For Comparison: Quad Lefts

Quad Lefts (also rare) are the opposite of Quad Rights. They're focused, structured, and built for strategy and execution. They:

Thrive on routines and systems
Learn through repetition
Love planning and detail
Are natural leaders and doers
Excel in logic, precision, and timelines

They’re here to create structure — while we’re here to flow with the current.

Looking at my astrology chart the other day with my coach, he pointed out that — based on my Venus placement and its aspects to my Pluto-Saturn conjunction — I actually thrive on systems. And that helped everything click into place.

I’ve been seeking systems all along — not structure. When I reflected on that, I realized I already have amazing systems in place that help me stay grounded while navigating all the responsibilities of life, like parenting and work. These systems create gentle boundaries within which I can flow — they support me without boxing me in.

I have systems for groceries, cooking meals for my family, skincare, exercise, and so much more. They’ve helped me shift away from who I thought I was supposed to be, and instead focus on living in alignment with my design — in flow, with ease. A few of my systems in place:

Groceries. I order all of my groceries online and do a weekly pickup. I have things favourited so I don’t have to think much—just click through and go for the regular groceries.

Cooking. This ebbs and flows. When I’m in the groove, I pick three recipes from a cookbook at the beginning of the week and order ingredients accordingly. When inspiration hits, I make one of the meals on my list. I always double the recipe so I have lunch ready for the next day. It’s not fancy, but it works.

Exercise. I rotate between three types of movement, depending on how I feel. I use the FORM app for weight training, I ruck for an hour (which is walking with a weighted vest), or I do a 45-minute steep hike right after school drop-off. It’s daily, but flexible.

Skin care. I have a basic system I do most days, unless I’m just not in the mood—and then I let it go. It’s usually do a rotation of face massage, red light with the LYMA laser, or EMS. I stick to a consistent set of products because I don’t love spending a lot of time on this.

Meditation. I have audios I listen to and take a break in the middle of the day when it feels right. Sometimes I’m consistent with morning meditation, and sometimes I’m not. The rhythm changes, and that’s okay.

I’m still learning how to live as a Quad Right in a Quad Left world. But each day, I get better at honoring my own rhythm.

Photo Credit: Brit Gill www.britneygill.com IG: @britgill

Gabriela Kesebi